Employment

So life has moved on a fair bit in the last month. I am soon to start a 9-5 job that should pay the bills and I have made sure it has nothing to do with design.

I think this may be a temporary move but right now there is nothing more I want than a little bit of stability in my life.

The one thing that has made me upset with my decision is how no-one seems to have any respect for it. I cannot live my life working between 18 and 40 hours on minimum wage in a job that is slowly destroying my social life and my chance of ever being who I want to be. I cannot be an artist or a textile designer because no-one wants to employ me.

Yes, I have a degree but in all honestly it is a piece of paper that says that I don't excel in design. As much as it pains me to say; I got a 2:2 in my degree and I am really ashamed of it. I worked really hard and it obviously wasn't enough. My work was good enough to go to new designers and good enough to be displayed on the university website but it was worth a D-.

When I ask myself what went wrong I can simply say that that wasn't the course for me and in three years I have learnt more about myself than I have about textile design. I could make a hundred excuses but they are not going to change that piece of paper on which 'could of tried harder' was an appropriate summary.

I am going to keep posting here because it is what I need to do. I have started sewing again and whilst it may just be silly things like cushion covers and fancy dress costumes I will be keeping my hand in.

being a graduate

So it's all over now. I have finished my course and come away with a degree.

Being a graduate is bloody hard, I have applied for more jobs than you would believe and I just want to get something I have a moderate chance of enjoying.

I am not completely disregarding it but for the moment I have packed away my portfolios, sewing equipment and all signs that I ever went to university because at the moment I feel completely negative.

I've not blogged in a long time but as from now this is going to be my career progression and side projects blog. I hope that in a month or so I will start itching to sew again and try and make some money from it.

Maybe this is it, maybe I will walk away from textiles and never look back. I hope that I can one day feel better about it and make something of my work and my supposed talents.

For now I want a 9-5 job that makes me enough money to stop having sleepless nights; I'd also quite like somewhere to store a 5ft chandelier....

Graduate Exhibition

A few poorly taken photos and a couple of me and my work

Degree Show

So. Tonight the degree show has been opened and I can honestly say I have never felt so relieved in my entire life. I'm exhausted!

After what seemed like the worst day in the history of days I re-made my chandelier and then re-made my exhibition.

Although I may not admit it I am eternally greatful to the people who helped me do it. Sleepless nights and feeling shattered are all worth it as it is 100% better than it was and I am immensely pleased with the final result.

Pictures will soon be posted but at the moment I am going to just enjoy finishing uni and having some time to myself.

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